Rodger’s Terrible Showing These Past Couple Weeks has Dropped Him Out of Wisconsin's Top Ten Current Athletes
Yelich- MVP last year and leading the league is cockshots. Obvious choice. I also saw he had a solid chug at the Bucks game.
Giannis Antetokounmpo- Most likely this years MVP even though he was dismantled by DRAAAAAAAKE. His long arms, mean stink face and ability to block or dunk anything makes him a strong #2.
David Bakhtiari- Did you see thsoe chugs at the Bucks games. Most humans cannot drink water that fast and for that reason he is in this posistion. I can honestly say I haven’t watched that much game film, but I’m sure it’s solid.
Wisconsin Badgers O-LINE- Im counting this as one unit because I really know nothing other than the fact that they’re giant humans that could eat me. They make Johnathan Taylor look like a Heisman candidate which takes a lot of work.
Ethan Happ- Had a great year for the Wisconsin Badgers, but Could probably be 3rd if he could hit a shot outside of 7 feet. Also, they are called FREE throws for a reason, Ethan.
Annie Pankowski- Top goal point scorer for the National Champion Womans Badgers Hockey team.
Jalen Johnson- 6-8 small forward out of Milwaukee. This kid is gonna tear it up for a major college basketball powerhouse not located in his home state.
Patrick Baldwin- 6-8 Small forward out of Sussex and is only entering his junior year in high school. This kid is gonna tear it up for a major college basketball powerhouse not located in his home state.
Graham Mertz- Has barely been in Wisconsin for a cup of coffee and has already landed himself in the top ten. There is Heisman buzz all over the state for this young badger
Uwec Outdoor Track and Field- Maybe a little biased, but they won the national championship this spring.
Outside Looking In:
Buzzcut Brad- Pure grit and grind player. I do think his shoulder surgery hurt him this year, but hes ready to bounce back and get into the top ten.
Aaron Rodgers- Once the top athlete in Wisconsin, we have seen a very rapid fall from grace. From getting hurt last year, to returning for a lack luster finish, to the most recent string of events: It will take him a big year for him to get back. I don’t know what was worse him not being able to escape the pass rush of a big lizard or not being able to take down one cup of beer. I mean everybody on this list is downing that cup sub 4.32 seconds. Most 6 year olds in Wisconsin are at least finishing. It's a disgrace, but hopefully hes practicing his chugging a little more in preparation for the Bucks next playoff run.
P.S. Mallory Edens should probably be on this list somewhere.